The Daily WTF

“So,” Burt said, “our bonuses at the end of the year are based on our systems uptime?”

“Well,” the middle manager introducing their new incentive program said, “not exactly. It’s part of your team’s performance targets, so we calcula-“

“Yeah, I get it,” Burt said. “But your top tier goes up to 99.999% What about those of us who get 100% up-time?”

“Well, 100% is unreasonable to expect and-“

“Our phone system can. I set up the PBX myself. It’s not going down. It’s the most reliable system in the company. You should give a higher bonus to teams that can hit 100% uptime.”

“Ah…” The manager paused, nodded, and said, “I’ll look into it,” in the tone that made it quite clear that nothing was getting looked into but the conversation needed to move on.

This was circa 2002, and Natalie had just joined Initech’s operations team. Mostly, she

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